Featured on the second Saturday of the meet will be champions Deweycheatumnhowe and Somebeachsomewhere, the top three-year old trotter and pacer, respectively.

The last time Somebeachsomewhere was in New Jersey he was beaten by a neck in one of the most exciting harness races of all-time, suffering his only career defeat in a then-world record to Art Official. Art Official is done for the year with an injury, but since that race, SBSW has not been beaten, while matching the all-age world record time of 1:46.4.

Somebeachsomewhere world record:

As for Dewey, his last race at the Meadowlands was his narrow victory in the Hambletonian, making him the first horse to win the biggest race in trotting while still undefeated. He has since been beaten twice, but has firmly established himself as the world’s best sophomore trotter.

Dewey in Hambletonian:

Both horses will not have to run in eliminations. Dewey and the trotters did not get enough entries into the race to merit eliminations, while Somebeachsomewhere earned a bye into the finals.

Most importantly, however, is that racing at the Meadowlands is back, and combined with the approaching bowl season, allows some of us to really reach the peak of our degeneracy.

If so, then Idaho may be the place for you.

You see, Idaho is set to vote on allowing “virtual” horse racing — that’s right parimutuel betting on computer generated races. You can’t get more honest than that.

In the interest of full disclosure, I’ve been waiting years for something like this to be invented, since I’m the type of guy that A) spends 90% of the time I’m out of my house at a race and sports book; and B) will be willing to bet on anything you’re offering odds on. For that reason, this is great for people like me, especially if they can work it out to “run” the races 24 hours a day.

How this will work is there will be a virtual stable of about 5000 horses (and growing), each with their own attributes, like real horses. Computers will do 25 calculations per second to determine how each horse runs during a virtual race. And people bet on what will happen, parimutuelly, meaning against each other, not the house.

From the Idaho Statesman (a newspaper, not a person):

“So far, 5,000 horses have been designed, each with different speed, acceleration, endurance, training and performance depending on weather and track conditions. Jockeys’ skills also differ.

Bieri said there are 25 computations per second for each of eight horses in a race, and the outcome cannot be known ahead of time. Races would not be available on demand. Betting sheets would be published a week in advance, listing horse performances in prior contests, making the races a game of skill, just like live racing, Bieri said.”

If this were to pass, betting could begin as early as Nov. 17. Hell, that’s before the Meadowlands opens back up. I may have a road trip in my future.

Somebeachsomewhere, the fastest 3-year old pacer of all-time, will be taking to the half-mile track at Yonkers in the Messenger Cup. He’ll be running against Little Brown Jug winner Shadow Play and four other non-factors for $650,000. Somebeachsomewhere is the morning line 1-2 favorite.

The Beach’s nemesis, Art Official, the only horse ever to defeat him, is also making news, as a torn muscle in his leg has prematurely ended his 3-year old season, killing any chance of a Meadowlands Pace rematch.

Art Official is expected to return as a 4-year old, while Somebeachsomewhere is ready to call it a career after next month’s Breeders Crown races at the Meadowlands.

And while I have your attention on harness racing, 3-year old trotting freak Deweycheatumnhowe will be running in a “special” $20,000 race at Vernon Downs for Halloween. So if you’re in the New York area and would like a free 10% on your money, put it all on Dewey to show in that race. Pretty much a guaranteed $2.10 on your $2 bet.

You can now return to ignoring harness racing, the sport of true degenerates.

Superhorse Curlin will definitely be running in the Breeder’s Cup Classic, attempting to become just the second horse ever to win it twice. There will be no Big Brown matchup, but Curlin defending his crown alone is worth the price of admission.

Shawn Alexander is once again employed in the NFL, as he signed a one-year deal with the Washington Redskins. Alexander will back up Clinton Portis while Ladell Betts is injured. How quickly they fall.

It’s almost as much fun to watch Boston sports fans fall from grace as it was to watch Yankee fans fall. It’s tough to have sympathy for a city full of asshole sports fans, isn’t it?

A fine look at why so many commentators of sports are idiots, and why Ron Jaworski and Cris Collinsworth are better than eveyone else. Having worked with Jaws before (albeit briefly), I will agree that the reason he is the best is because the guy works his ass off.

–News and Links Archive–

Big Brown injured his right front foot in training for the event, enough so that the horse’s owners thought it was in Big Brown’s best interest to call it quits from racing and instead become a full-time stud.

Big Brown will retire from horse racing having won seven out of eight lifetime starts, including absolutely dominant efforts at the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness. His lone blemish came in a last-place finish at the Belmont. His career earnings were $3,614,500.

Upon retiring, Big Brown will stand at Three Chimneys Farm in Kentucky, as part of a lucrative deal worth in the neighborhood of $50 million.

“It’s in the best interest of the horse to let him recover and move on to his breeding career,” said Michael Iavarone of IEAH Stables, co-owners of Big Brown. “This is devastating. He had a great work this morning, and we were very excited about going to Breeders’ Cup. This is not only devastating to us, but to all of his fans who won’t get to see him run in the Classic.”

There is no doubt that a matchup between Big Brown and Curlin would have been the most interesting event in thoroughbred horse racing this year, next to Big Brown’s attempt at the Triple Crown.

As for Curlin, he will surely be the heavy favorite in the Classic now, as he continues to prove just what a champion race horse is. I wish the owners of Somebeachsomewhere (harness) would look at Curlin and Mister Big (harness) and see what great opportunities there are for aged horses, outside of studding.

Oh well, Big Brown had a great career, and will now be the horse everyone gets compared to when they win the Kentucky Derby and Preakness. “Yeah, Big Brown was great too, but he couldn’t handle the Belmont…”

According to BoxingScene.com, Golden Boy head-honcho Richard Schaefer told a few people on press row last weekend that he is planning on making an “indecent proposal” to Floyd Mayweather to come out of retirement and fight Shane Mosley. Mayweather’s people told him that Floyd is retired, and nothing else. After watching how sluggish Mosley looked in many parts of his recent fight with Ricardo Mayorga, he and his people should be wanting no part of a fighter as quick as Mayweather.

In a (not very) shocking turn of events, Oscar De La Hoya has said that the Manny Pacquiao debacle in December won’t be his final fight. Considering he’s already talking about fighting Ricky Hatton next year, I don’t think anyone should be terribly surprised by this.

Super horse Somebeachsomewhere tied the all-age world record in harness racing last weekend, and will attempt to break it this weekend. The bad news is that his nemesis Art Official drew into a different race, so we’ll likely have to wait until the Breeder’s Crown in November to see a rematch of the Meadowlands Pace.

Travis Henry is smart.

According to HasLaneKiffinBeenFired.com, “Yes. Yes he has.” Brilliant site. Hold on to that one, webmaster, he’s young enough that you might have four or five more uses out of it.

–News and Links Archive–

It was the first win for trainer/driver Ray Schnittker. Said Schnittker:

“Crazed was getting to him pretty good, but [Deweycheatumnhowe] refused to let him get by. It’s OK if i die now because I got [the Hambo win].

“The front end wasn’t great. I thought he night get beat halfway down the lane, he might have had a few shoes loose. A quarter of the way down the lane I pushed him as much as he could go.”

Dewey ran the mile in 1:52.0, the third fastest Hambletonian ever, and the fastest since Self Possessed ran a 1:51.3 in 1999.

After the failures of Big Brown and Somebeachsomewhere to win their biggest races of the year, the pressure was on Schnittker and Dewey, and they certainly did not disappoint.

Dewey will next run in Canada, then return to the states to run in Kentucky before returning to the Meadowlands later in the year for the Breeder’s Crown.

After setting blistering fractions of :26, :51.4, and 1:19.1, Art Official and Somebeachsomewhere battled it out in an epic stretch duel, with Art Official sticking his neck out at the finish line to win the $1.1 million Meadowlands Pace.

The loss marks the first of the career of Somebeachsomewhere, who had assembled an impressive 10-for-10 start to his career. He was being compared to the great Niatross and considered one of the best that ever raced, and his 1:47 certainly helps the case. His loss, however, will take some time to recover from if he wants to be considered the best ever.

Welterweight Oscar Diaz collapsed in his corner Wednesday night and had to have emergency brain surgery, leaving him in critical condition. Diaz was in a coma and breathing only with the help of a ventilator, but his vital signs were good.

The proposed Shane Mosley – Ricardo Mayorga fight may be moving to September 27, and may be moving off of pay-per-view; where it never belonged in the first place.

Somebeachsomewhere has been made the 2-5 morning line favorite for this Saturday’s Meadowlands Pace. Say what you will about Big Brown, this is the best 3-year old horse in the world right now. If you’ve never watched harness racing, watch this horse run Saturday night. The race is scheduled to run at 10:14 PM EST.

–News and Links Archive–

If you thought Big Brown was good, try to catch Somebeachsomewhere this weekend against the best 3-year olds in the world at the Big M. So far he’s an impressive 9-for-9 in his career, and won nearly all of them for fun. Through just nine races, he’s already earned over $1.6 million.

Just 3-for-3 this season, Somebeachsomewhere has been quite impressive, winning the Pepsi North America Cup at Mohawk Raceway in Canada in an impressive 1:49 flat.

Like Big Brown, it’s a foregone conclusion that Somebeachsomewhere will be retiring immediately following his 3-year old campaign to make little Somebeachsomewheres. But Darryl Kaplan writes on Standardbred Canada that this should not be assumed, and that harness racing has to do whatever it takes to keep this horse running.

I understand that for a lot of you, I’m speaking a different language right now, but if you’re a sports fan, you’ll appreciate sporting dominance. If you get SNY on your cable or satellite dish, tune into Saturday’s Meadowlands replay show, or if you get TVG on your DIRECTV package, tune in Saturday night to watch it live. You won’t be disappointed.

For your viewing pleasure, here is Somebeachsomewhere winning the North America Cup.

The Meadowlands Pace finals will be held on July 19, featuring the top ten finishers from this weekend’s eliminations.